Vijays Blog!!!

Manmohan Singh to Bush – We are sending Indians to the moon next year. Bush – Wow! How Many? Manmohan Singh - 100 25 - OBC 25 - SC 20 - ST 5 - Handicapped 5 - Sports Persons 5 - Terrorist Affected 5 - Kashmiri Migrants 9 - Politicians and if possible 1 – Astronnaut

My Friend When true friendship binds two individuals together, that bond can never be broken. For in times of confusion, I will be there to listen to you. In times of sadness, I will be there to console you. In times of anger, I will be there to talk with you even when miles separate us. My friend, when you are confused, when you are sad, when you are angry, search your heart, and I will be there. I am and always will be your friend.

Try this out, this is a friendship puzzle ">clik here !!!

Let's say it's 6.15p m and you're going home (alone of course), after an unusually hard day on the job. You're really tired, upset and frustrated. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to adiate out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don't know if you'll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself. HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help,the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness. However,these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must bedeep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep ...

Definitions What's the difference between stress, tension and panic? Stress is when wife is pregnant, Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, and Panic is when both are pregnant. Equation 7 Glance = 1 Smile 7 Smile = 1 Meeting 7 Meeting = 1 Kiss 7 Kisses = 1 Proposal 7 Proposal = 1 Marriage - And that 1 Bloody marriage has 777777777777 problems. So beware of glance! Girl Friends Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS; 1,Too Many Questions. 2,Difficult to Understand. 3,More Explanation is Needed. 4,Result is always FAIL! Marriage A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.She went downstairs looking for him. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appeared to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She saw tears rolling from his eyes as he sipped his coffee. "What's the matter with you, my dear? Why are you down here at this time of the night?" she asked. "Do you remember twenty years ago when we were dat...

1) Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month. 2) Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby. 3) Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month. 4) Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby. 5) Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available. 6) Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources. 7) Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months. 8) Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to Produce a baby. and lastly........ 9) Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby 10) Team Lead is a person actually knows how many men and women required to deliver the baby, but will not tell anyone

Aries Employee Profile (march 21 - april 19) Aries employees make excellent troubleshooters.They'll usually want to be out in the field at a variety of different work sites fixing things. They certainly won't be happy for very long behind a desk in a 9 to 5 schedule. The bored Aries employee who has been forced into a square hole will typically be restless, angry, and careless with details. No amount of money would compensate for being stuck in a routine job. Money in fact isn't why they are working at all. They do want to be paid fairly and need a status position to satisfy their competitive tendencies--but even more importantly, they'll want challenging new projects They typically like to have a sense of responsibility and need to feel needed. In return, they'll give their all and provide detailed, consistent work. They will literally work themselves to exhaustion to prove themselves. If you want to keep your Aries co- worker productive and happy, you'll want ...

I thought you would be interested in the BBC's Face Memory Test. This is part of a series of tests designed to help you understand and improve your sleep patterns. Try the Face Memory Test here: Click !!!

When the school reopened in June, And we settled in our new desks and benches. When we queued up in book depot, And got our new books and notes. When we wanted two Sundays and no Mondays, yet Managed to line up daily for the morning prayers. We learnt writing with slates and pencils, and Progressed To fountain pens and ball pens and then micro tips. We began drawing with crayons and evolved to Color pencils and finally sketch pens. We started calculating first with tables and then with Clarke's tables and advanced to calculators and computers. When we chased one another in the corridors in Intervals, and returned to the classrooms drenched in sweat. When we had lunch in classrooms, corridors, Playgrounds, under the trees and even in cycle shed. When all the colors in the world, ...

Very important - NEVER LIGHT CANDLE in A/C ROOMS. Prevention is better than cure... Please read this and pass on... NEVER LIGHT CANDLE in A/C. ROOM. A person passed away last week due to carbon-monoxide poisoning. It happened when she lighted an aroma therapeutic candle for the night in a room with air-conditioner ON.Due to lack of oxygen in the room, the burning of the candle cannot Fully oxidize & thus forms dangerous carbon monoxide. Carbon monoxide will prevent oxygen exchange in the lungs, resulting in the Person dozing off to a state of unconsciousness & eventually death in less than an hour, depending on the room size. This is to make you aware of such danger when lighting aroma therapeutic candles in any unventilated rooms.

THE WORST HIJACKING We shall never know the identity of the man who in 1976 made the most unsuccessful hijack attempt ever. On a flight across America, he rose from his seat, drew gun and took the stewardess hostage. "Take me to Detroit," he demanded. "We're already going to Detroit," she replied. "Oh ... good," he said, and sat down again. THE WORST BANK ROBBERY In August 1975 three men were on their way in to rob the Royal Bank of Scotland at Rothesay, when they got stuck in the revolving doors. They had to be helped free by the staff and, after thanking everyone, sheepishly left the building. A few minutes later they returned and announced their intention of robbing the bank, but none of the staff believed them. When they demanded 5,000 pounds in cash, the head cashier laughed at them, convinced that it was a practical joke. Then one of the men jumped over the counter, but fell to the floor clutching his ankle. The other two tried to make their geta...

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This is a real incident that has happened in Madurai . Cell Phone Usage at Rainy Time In continuation of the news item appearing in today's Daily paper on the death of 3 persons in Oothangudi(Near to Madurai), I heard the details of cause of death as follows:- At the cemetray, in total, there were about 12 persons out of which 4 of them were under a palm tree 5 of others were also standing beside these 4 It was raining with thunder and LIGHTNING after 7 pm One of them, who had a cellphone with him, had received incoming call and when he swithced on to talk the LIGHTNING had struck and the total effect of SHOCK attacked all 4 of them at the spot The man with the cellphone had died on the spot 2 others standing near to him were declared dead at Meenakshi Mission Hospital 1 is seriously injured and now in hospital 10000 Watts currnet has passed on inside the body of the man died on the spot as said by Doctors in hospital Hence, usage of CELL PHONE AT RAINY TIME IS PRONE TO ACCIDENT.

This is really true.White peacock is the resembler of good luck.Ppl are ready to pay lakhs of rupees to get just one feather of this peacock.One way to recognise its genuinness is that its shadow forms on the same side from where the light comes i.e on the opposite side of where it is supposed to form.This is true.

If you have been in IT industry too long these are your symptoms: 1.) U use phrases like "No issues" and "Value addition" in everyday parlance. For e.g. When talking about your doodhwalla, U say, "His milk does zero value addition to my health but he is the only guy around so no issues" 2.) Ur prime source of entertainment is the forwards send to U by friends whose faces U cant remember. 3.) U drink more tea or coffee than water. 4.) U keep trying to shut down ur home computer by pressing Ctrl+Alt+Del (used to lock office comps) 5.) When ur mobile rings at home, U rush outside to receive thecall. 6.) When U make calls at home, U accidentally dial "0"to get an outside line. 7.) U haven't played Solitaire with real cards in years. 8.) Ur last crush was a girl in HR, ur current crush is the new girl in HR and all ur crushes in the future w...

Prove 3=2?? This seems to be an anomaly or whatever u call in mathematics. It seems, Ramanujam found it but never disclosed it during his life time and that it has been found from his dairy. See this illustration: -6 = -6 9-15 = 4-10 adding 25/4 to both sides: 9-15+25/4 = 4-10+25/4 Changing the order 9+25/4-15 = 4+25/4-10 (this is just like a² + b² - 2a b = (a-b)².) Here a1 = 3, b1=5/2 for L.H.S and a2 =2, b2=5/2 for R.H.S. So it can be expressed as follows: (3-5/2)(3-5/2) = (2-5/2)(2-5/2) Taking positive square root on both sides: 3 - 5/2 = 2 - 5/2 3 = 2 ???????? Can u find out any mistake in the above....

1. Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving. 2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee. 3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband! 4. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash. 5. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms. 6. Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent. 7. Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without... but whatever ! you do, you'll regret it later. 8. You can't buy love . . . but you pay heavily for it. 9. True friends stab you in the front. 10. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me. 11. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. 12. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired 13. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong! ...

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him". *********** A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently,she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, ...

Intrguing Equations!!: 2. An Idea + An Idiot = A Dot com. 3. One Chinese gymnast = India's Gold Medal tally since 1896 4. Sushmita Sen - 1.2 feet = Salman Khan. 5. Special Effects in Shampoo ads = Special effects in Jurassic park. 6. 4 weeks in Switzerland + London + New Zealand + Canada = a 4 minute song in a Hindi movie. 7. Ajay Devgan + cosmetic surgery + acting ability + personality + own production company = Kajol 9. Amitabh Bachchan - Mrityudaata + Kaun Banega Crorepati = A SUPERSTAR. 10. Amitabh Bachchan + Jaya Bachchan - Talent = Abhishek Bachchan 11. Any actor + Any actress + many movies = David Dhawan 12. 1 smile + 32 teeth = Govinda 13. 1 person - shirt = Salman Khan 14. 1 person + straight hair + un-straight walk = Sanjay Dutt 15. 1 hand + 10 kg weight = Sunny Deol 16. One engagement + Two weddings + Three wedding songs + Four hundred Relatives + A house bigger than Buckingham Palace = One sooraj Barjataya Film 17.... This one is the best of all.......... ...

An insect falls into a mug of beer... Reactions: Englishman: Throws his mug away and walks out American: Takes the insect out and drinks the beer Chinese: Eats the insect and throws the beer away Japanese: Drinks the beer with insect as it is coming free Indian: Sells the beer to the American and insect to the Chinese and gets a new mug of beer. ......INTELLIGENT INDIANS Pakistani: -Accuses the Indian for throwing insect into his beer -Relates the issue to Kashmir -Asks the Chinese for Military aid -Takes a loan from the American to buy one more mug of beer .