Vijays Blog!!!

A man wanted to enter an exclusive club but did not know the password that was required. He waited by the door and listened. A club member knocked on the door and the doorman said, "twelve." The member replied, "six " and was let in. A second member came to the door and the doorman said, "six." The member replied, "three" and was let in. The man thought he had heard enough and walked up to the door. The doorman said ,"ten" and the man replied, "five." But he was not let in. What should have he said? ???????????? Ans:- 3 The man had to reply the number of characters in the word the Doorman was asking. He should have replied "Three" instead of "Five".

The artist says he spent 500 hours painting this picture of Venice in MS Paint !

LAW OF QUEUE: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now. LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one. LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. LAW OF THE WORKSHOP: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. LAW OF THE ALIBI: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire. BATH THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings. LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. LAW OF THE RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will! LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last. LAW OF COFFEE: As soon ...

Hindustan Lever has 5 job vacancies in their deo /perfume Plant. If you're interested, apply to: hrhl@hinlever.com. The Package: 1. Proposed salary is Net Rs.32,000/mth, 2. Health benefits 3. 6 hours/day 4. 5 working days/week 5. Transport provided 6. Medical Benefits - Rs.8500/pm Conditions: 1. You only need to have a very good sense of smell. 2. Willingness to explore with your nose

Pls. Read this story its really a touching story....................... Indian movies will alwayz be an eye opener. Here is a story of Vijaykant's next (Tamil) movie It's named as "Captain Planet"(WOW !!!where do they get these names?? ) Vijaykant is a scientist in NASA.......( yes folks..........u read that right. NASA...the American space lab - A very big set designed for this by kalaipuli S.Dhaanu). When our hero was busy launching a satellite to Pluto, his wife simran is about to deliver a baby and she wanted to meet him. But the launch process badly needs a person like our hero, and there is no other option. Senior scientist Radha asks him to stay back till it gets launched. Our well committed hero successfully launches the satellite, and comes back home in a horse ( where are all the planes gone.??....:)), but his wife is dead. Mean time, other scientists in NASA claim that they wer responsible for the launch and they didnt recognise Vijaykanth. He resigns from ...

* Don't smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher * Don't eat fruits immediately - Immediately eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1hr before meal. * Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest. * Don't loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted & blocked. * Don't bathe - Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach. * Don't walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true....

Father : I want you to marry a girl of my choice Son : "I will choose my own bride!" Father: "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter." Son : "Well, in that case...ok" Next Father approaches Bill Gates. Father: "I have a husband for your daughter." Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!" Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank." Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok" Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank. Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president." President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!" Father: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law." President: "Ah, in that case...ok" This is how business is done!!

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